HAPPY WIFE

Hello Everyone! Welcome to the New Year!  Last year had many struggles and set backs, especially with finances, but God gave me more then I deserved.  When times get hard and the battle begins, I remember   (Philippians 4:11-13) I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstance.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do everything through him who give me strength.

Happiness is a gift only you can give yourself – Do you ever wonder when walking down the street, if people crossing your path are happy?  Do you ever wonder why you are, or are not happy? Do you ever wonder why it’s so hard to stay happy?  Happiness is not something that happens naturally. My secret for happiness comes from my relationships with family, friends and those closest to me, but not without my relationship with Jesus Christ.  I discovered that for me, true happiness can only be achieved through God.  Knowing who He is and what He has done for me, has allowed me to recognize happiness.  I respect others choices to believe as they wish, but for me, I choose to believe in Jesus Christ.

Right now I am under attack with happiness as a wife.  I have never been completely happy in my marriage, and my situation is due solely to my choice.  I married someone unequally yoked, and now I’m living with the consequences.  For me, there is no real right or wrong in my decision, there is good or bad consequences.  As a Christian woman, I knew I should have married a Christian man that believes as I do.  However, as many Christian women do, I didn’t heed to the Word and married thinking I could change him.  I tried to change, what could not be changed through me.  As I constantly strive to be a Godly woman,  living with a nonbeliever that doesn’t comprehend or respect my relationship with the Lord, is very difficult.  My husband is a good person.  He figures that if he pays the bills, doesn’t smoke, drink or hang out with his buddies, that should be sufficient.  He even had me thinking it was enough, so I felt guilty and tried to play the role of a perfect wife.  I did all the right things, even if it meant forgetting myself.  He’s still unreceptive to my thoughts or needs.  Most of the time I feel invisible.  Again, like most Christian women married to a nonbeliever —- I prayed, pleaded and cried out to the Lord for guidance!  I thought if my husband had a relationship with God, then I could have completely happiness.  I thought this, only until I read “HOW TO BE A HAPPY WIFE OF AN UNSAVED HUSBAND” by Linda Davis.  After reading this book I realized I was doing it all wrong. Not because Linda says so in her book, but because it all makes sense.  I realized that you can’t change, what doesn’t want to be changed.

I still pray that my husband realizes the need for a relationship with God, but I do not dwell on it or allow it to drag me down.  Linda’s book taught me to grow my own relationship with God, so that I can continue to be happy.  I know now, that my husband will have a relationship with God when the time is right.  I have resorted to the fact that my happiness comes from within me and my faith. –– Now it’s time for you to find WHERE your happiness comes from. No matter what type of relationship you are in, you deserve to be happy!

Never lose hope and don’t try to control what is not in your control.  I learned it the hard way!  If you read “HOW TO BE A HAPPY WIFE OF AN UNSAVED HUSBAND” or other books focused on happiness by Linda Davis, maybe you can find your own answers.  I found mine while living with an unsaved husband.  God bless you Now and Forever!!!! REMEMBER!  God… is the blessed controller of all things, the king over all kings and the master of all masters.  (I Timothy 6:15)

An – InTence Mind

 

 

 

1000 Questions For Couples Book Rview

One of the biggest reason marriages end in divorce is because couples fail to ask the big questions before they walk down the aisle.

If couples simply spent some time asking each other the questions that really matter, they’d greatly increase their chances of staying together.

The great thing about a “question book” is that it makes it easier to ask those difficult questions and encourages an environment to address them.

But is Michael Webb’s “1000 Questions For Couples” the right book for this?

In short, yes. Most question books ‘beat around the bush,’ never really providing the important questions, and others simply don’t have enough questions.

On the other hand, Webb has put together the most comprehensive collection of questions, covering every single topic you’d ever want to know about before tying the knot.

It includes tough subjects like money, children & child rearing, career, past and present relationships, religion, morals, convictions & beliefs, personality, and even sex.

But don’t get me wrong ­ while there are many serious and tough topics to discuss, there are also many “lighter” yet just as important topics, including the car and driving, vacations, food and well being, pets, and your favorite things.

That’s one thing I really loved about this book. It covered every conceivable topic from the super serious to the light-hearted and fun, making it easy for couples to start with easy questions and build their way up to important ones.

Also, a great bonus is having the ability to deliver 3 – 5 of the questions to my email each day, making everything automatic. I just go about my day and get new questions to ask my loved one, without having to really think about it.

In all, there’s nothing really negative I can say about this book. It delivers exactly what it says and covers every question you would ever want to ask your loved one.

I highly recommend this book for everyone. NOT just couples who are thinking of getting married but also couples who just want to feel closer together, or people dating, who just want more things to talk about.

For all the details click on the image:

2 Ways To Bring Back Passion Into Your Relationship

After the initial dating phase, you find yourselves losing some of that sparkle. It’s natural, and all long-term couples are faced with this problem. The ones who survive are the ones who figure out how to inject more passion into their relationship, before it’s too late. Don’t let your relationship fizzle and die. Use these two tips to inject more passion into your relationship now.

Keep Dating

Many couples forget what attracted them to their mates in the first place. Sometimes work or kids leave them with little time to grow as a couple and they move away from dating.

This can pose a serious problem for couples. I know a couple that’s fallen into this situation. After the birth of their first daughter, the wife was so tired all the time with taking care of the infant that she no longer had any interest in her husband. It’s important to keep that spark alive by continuing to date. Whether it is once a week or once a month, it’s important to get some alone time with each other. This might mean getting a babysitter for an evening or putting overtime at work on hold. If your partner is worth it, don’t let the relationship grow stagnant and die. I know this sounds easier said than done, but keeping that spark takes a lot of time and energy, especially when a newborn.

Make Love In Weird Places

One great way to inject more passion into your relationship is to take your love making outside the bedroom. Make love in different rooms, in public places or places that you’d never normally think of as a hot-spot. Many couples fall into routine lovemaking….boring, right? While there’s nothing wrong with routine, it’s always a good thing to add some spontaneity to the relationship.

Remember when you first met, and couldn’t keep your hands off of each other? That’s the kind of passion you want to recapture. Your partner wants to know that they’re still attractive, desirable and you can’t get enough of them. They want to feel like they still have it in them to drive you crazy with lust, with a glance or a touch. Flirt with each other and build the anticipation. My sister and her husband have been married for 10+ years, and they claim they’re still on their honeymoon.

For most couples, it’s easy to fall into a rut. Taking each other for granted and doing the same thing over and over again, will lead most couples down the boredom highway. Every once in a while (as much as possible!) you need to hit the gas and swerve off that highway if you want your relationship to last. It’s not terribly difficult to inject more passion into your relationship and it can be a lot of fun.

Try it out….who knows? You may discover another part of your spouse you never knew existed.

To Catch A Cheat

How texting, sexting, and the digital age are changing monogamy and the face of modern-day marriage
By Carrie Sloan | December 21, 2009 1:00 p.m.

When Tiger Woods’ many indiscretions were discovered, his wife allegedly turned his golf clubs against him, bought a Swedish mansion in her own name—and, perhaps most tellingly, threw out his phone.

As other woman after other woman comes forward, spilling the gory details of her time with Tiger, it seems more and more likely that a telltale text message may be what, in the end, did the big cad in.

Unfortunately, if that’s the case, Elin Nordegren won’t be the first—or the last—spouse to discover her significant other’s dalliances the new-fangled way.

“An intercepted text is the 2010 version of lipstick on the collar,” says Jonathan Alpert, a New York City psychologist, who’s recently seen a spike in clients wrestling with the aftermath of technologically fueled affairs. And the behavior is rampant on both coasts: “More frequently than ever, this is the way people are finding out that their partners are cheating—whether it’s cheating with sex involved or an emotional affair,” says Yvonne Thomas, PhD, an L.A. psychologist.

In fact, e-mail and texting—and now “sexting”—have leveled the playing field, making straying easier in the first place, whether you’re a professional athlete or the average American.

There are even websites, like ashleymadison.com, designed to make a “more efficient” way for married couples to stray, says founder Noel Biderman, who built the site in 2001 after reading a statistic indicating that 35 percent of users on dating websites were actually married and looking.

In fact, most of today’s indiscretions start virtually—a volley of desire lobbed back and forth at the speed of light, gaining intensity as it goes.
Yesteryear’s trysts—bosses and secretaries, long nights at the office—now seem almost quaint, more like a Mad Men plotline.

Perhaps the only thing that hasn’t changed is that when an unsuspecting partner clicks to find an e-mail that rocks her or him to the core, the pain isn’t mitigated by the digital age.

“It felt like an out-of-body experience,” says Wendy Silver*, 33, who discovered a slew of graphic text messages between her live-in boyfriend of three years and several different women an hour before her younger sister’s engagement party.

She wasn’t even snooping. He was out golfing for the day, and when she called, his jean pocket rang—he’d left the phone behind. Because he was hosting the after-party, she wanted to be sure he hadn’t missed any messages.

“I’d never checked his phone before in my life,” she says. “I just trusted him.” After all, they’d grown up together. She’d known him since she was 14. At the time, they had been talking engagement.

Silver didn’t waste any time. When he got back home, she confronted him and told him to leave the party. He burst into tears and apologized.

“I didn’t think you would ever find out,” he said.

“A part of me wishes I hadn’t,” she admits.

Dee Sanderson, 34, author of How to Marry a Loser Without Even Trying, was a little more tech-savvy: A computer programmer by trade, she decided to bug her husband’s computer based on a bad feeling she had.

“It was a period in my marriage where it felt like something was wrong. We weren’t connecting,” she says. “I couldn’t seem to get him interested in doing anything together.”

She felt stupid installing the trace. “It will probably be nothing, and then I’ll feel bad about not trusting him,” she said. Instead she was shocked by her virtual haul.

“Lo and behold, he had three or four different e-mail accounts he’d opened, and he was trying to solicit women,” she says. “One asked him outright, ‘Are you in a relationship?’ And he said, ‘Oh, it’s nothing serious.’ That was what hurt the worst. He basically said that our marriage didn’t mean anything.”

She kicked him out—then relented, for a time.

Go here to read the rest of this article.

What Do Women Want From Men

It’s no secret that men and women are different. It is no news that they look for different things in a relationship. They all want different things, different men for their different personalities. What do women want from men?  There are as many answers as there are types of women: young, old, fat, skinny, talkative, quiet, beautiful, not so beautiful.

One thing that is clear is that everyone looks for a perfect relationship. Men are remarkable by their caution and carefulness. Women though are much more fussy. When it comes to choosing men, they not only have a greater list of requirements, they’re also keen to make the effort to help the guy change. But despite their striving for talking things through, most men still struggle to understand exactly what women need to be happy with them.

What do women want? They just want to be happy. They just have a different way of showing it. If you learn their language, listen when you’d rather speak, hug instead of just walking away, tell the truth till it hurts, be a man she can depend on and love her like you love yourself. You’ll no longer ask what women want, they’ll be asking you what you want and give it to you.

Here are some true things that we can say safely women want from men.

Value.  Women want to know that their man is someone other women would want. They want a certain “gotta have” quality about their man. This is why, when we go out with a girlfriend, women give men looks and always seem more
interested. It’s annoying but true: the easiest way to get a girl, is to have one already!

Structure. A woman wants stability, balance, a sense of order. She wants someone she can rely on. You say you’re going to be home at 9:00, you be home at 9:00. You are late? Call. The hardest thing for us guys is to differentiate between support and total control. Creating a foundation and stability doesn’t mean trying to solve all the problems to the point you disempower the one you love. Your love is not a crutch but a bond. A bond where dependability is synonymous with trust.

Security. Women want to feel safe with a man. They want to know that everyting’s gonna be all right. This doesn’t mean you have to be huge and strong, or have millions in the bank. It just means you have to talk reassuringly to her, look after her safety, and assure her when she needs it that things are going to be OK.

Love . Love them most of all. Let it all out. Let  it all out every day, every minute of every second of every day. Be love, crawl up inside of it and approach every problem with the question what would love do now? If you do this, fear will never enter your life.

Appreciation. Women DO want to feel appreciated. They just don’t want to be obsessed over. Guys, show interest in a woman, and make her feel beautiful and wanted – but don’t slave over her and make her feel like you can’t live without her. That’s just pathetic, and drives women away.

Don’t lie. A woman can forgive a lot of things but she won’t put up with a snake in the grass liar. If she caught you in a lie once she would never have more trust in you. Lie to a woman and you are dissing her. Tell the truth, you live to play another day.

Hug her. Hug her in the morning, hug her before you leave to work, e-mail her a hug and hug her ten times when you get home. You must make her feel loved and protected.

Smile. Women don’t like boring men. Be someone who smiles, who doesn’t take life too seriously, who lets loose. That shows a lot more value than a guy who’s stiff and serious – even if he is good looking or wealthy.

A woman wants a man with a purpose. It’s not necessary to have a lot of money and a great car but they do want to be  headed towards success.  They do want you living up to your potential.

So, as a summary women like to be understood, be happiness, be respected and they also want honesty. But, as the time goes by, the woman wishes change because she is setting new goals. Why men can’t figure women out is because they are a masterpiece in progress.

Click here for a great resource on this topic.